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My eyes closed, and my shoulders slumped as I walked into the house after my shift and saw my mother passed out on the couch. Two bottles of cheap vodka were empty on the table. She had promised so many times to stop. I wanted to believe her, but she kept proving that I shouldn’t.

I ran a bath, then woke her up and put her arm over my shoulder and helped her to the bathroom. She lay in the bath as I held the showerhead over her face. That always helped her to sober up.

After the bath, she lay on the couch and watched TV. I was hungry and wanted to make us something to eat, so I opened the fridge and saw that she hadn’t bought food as she promised. Looking at the vodka bottles reminded me of how she had spent the money. I hadn’t earned tips that day, so I couldn’t buy us food.

I sat next to mom and looked at her, hoping that she would say that was the last time. She kept looking at the TV in silence. After some time, she said, “Everything’s going to be okay, Joeleen. Don’t you worry.”

I wanted to believe her, but I didn’t know how we would pay for the motel the following day.

In the morning, Mom told me to put my bag in the boot as we were heading for Utah. That was our fifth move for the year. Whenever she drank our money, we were back on the road looking for greener pastures. I wondered if we would ever find it.

Moving around often meant that I was spending more time looking for work than earning money. That’s one of the reasons I had never saved up to study Biochemistry. I was also afraid to leave Mom by herself because I knew what she’d end up doing.

The positive thing that I extracted from our situation was learning that alcohol or any other substance would never make my situation better. It can only make it worse.

Mom told me that she started drinking when I was five. I believed that she started when Dad left her after she got pregnant at nineteen years old. I can only imagine how she felt, and I have the utmost respect for her for not aborting me. There is no doubt that she had it rough, but that wasn’t an excuse to drink herself to oblivion.

On our way, Mom looked at my stomach as it rumbled. She grabbed my hand and said, “Stay positive, Joeleen. Mama will sort everything out.”

Positivity was the only thing I had when Mom was passed out. I loved spending time with her and hearing her childhood stories. I felt sorry for her because she started well in life, but her fortune changed when she met Dad. Since she was kind enough to look after me, I would stick with her and do whatever it took to ensure that she was happy. How could I not? She’s my mom.

We slept the first night on the road in the car.

In the morning, I was fortunate to pick up a shift at a diner after I saw the hiring sign on the window. I didn’t know what Mom did while I was at work, but I was certain that she wasn’t drinking because we were broke.

At the end of the day, the owner paid me fifty dollars for the shift and told me to come back the following day. I had made hundred dollars in tips, so I booked a motel room and bought sandwiches. I kept the rest of the money for gas. Although I was grateful for having a roof over my head, every motel we stayed at was on the main road. Truckers honked their loud horns late at night, and perverts had sex with prostitutes next door. I craved tranquillity.

The following day, I made two hundred dollars at the diner. I walked into the motel room, smiling and holding dinner boxes that I had picked up at the supermarket. Nothing gave me more satisfaction than seeing Mom sober, eating and me having a full stomach.

After dinner, Mom said, “We’re gotta head back out onto the road tomorrow.”

I closed my eyes and sighed under my breath. Stability would do me wonders. I couldn’t wait to find the place where we would settle for years. The longest we had stayed at one place was three months.

“I’m actually enjoying the diner,” I said. “It’s good money, and the boss treats me well. Can’t we stay for a little while?”

“You know I’m doing this for us. Your Mama wants the good life for you and her.”

Mom had used a dating column in a newspaper to meet men, hoping to find a rich one. Lonely men had advertised their desire to meet a long-term partner with the potential to marry. Mom usually sent them a text, and the men called soon after. They would speak for a few hours before Mom determined potential suitability. After meeting dozens of them, we were still on the road.

“This time is different, said Mom. “I’ve got a good feeling about this one.”

“What’s his name?”

“Willy. He’s got a farm in Utah, and he’s lonely. I’m hoping that I’m what he’s looking for.”

And I was hoping that Willy was what we were looking for. I wasn’t sure what that was. I guess somebody who had a full-time job, some savings and wouldn’t beat my Mom. That would be a refreshing change.

Mom asked me for a hundred dollars when we got to the gas station, despite filling up only seventy. I gave the attendant the money and stuck my hand out when he brought the change. I didn’t want to disrespect Mom by not trusting her with money, but it was for her own good.

We arrived at the farm as the sun barely peeked above the horizon. I smiled, looking at the green grass and the wooden horse fence. A black horse galloped towards the fence, and I stroked it.

The white house, made of planks, was spacious. We walked around the back and saw a barn. Behind it was a massive field where cows grazed. Willy also had a hen house, stocked with hundreds of chickens. My eyes widened as I saw them.

“What ya think, honey? Did Mama find a good one or what?”

We hadn’t yet met Willy, so I couldn’t say. So far, he had more than the bums Mom usually dated.

We walked from behind the house towards the porch when Willy stepped out. He looked like he was in his seventies, and he had a belly, grey beard and dishevelled hair that surrounded his massive bald spot.

He stepped towards us, smiled and hugged my mother, then said, “Sue-Allen, so nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you, too.”

“This must be your daughter,” he said, looking at me.

“Good afternoon, sir. I’m Joeleen.”

He looked at Mom. “Pretty little thing, ain’t she?”

“Nice to meet you. Call me Willy.”

He invited us inside, then gave us a tour of the house. Every inch of the house was meticulous, free from dirt and every item placed exactly where it should be.

“This place looks wonderful. It’s so clean,” I said.

“Maria comes in every third day or so to clean up. She’s been with me for years.”

“She’s the domestic servant?”

“Yes. I’ve also got several employees who help me with the farming. I’ve got horses, cows, chickens and even a pigsty.”

“Yes, Mom and I had a quick peek. Hope you don’t mind?”

“Not at all. Make yourself at home.”

The cook had prepared dinner, and Willy hosted it at a long table. I couldn’t remember the last time we ate at a dining table, especially with company.

“Since I see that you’re quite an inquisitive young lady, what questions do you have for me?” asked Willy.

“Hope you don’t mind me asking about your previous relationships?”

“Not at all. I haven’t dated much since my wife passed away ten years ago. There’s not too many options out here for me, and I tend to spend quite a bit of time farming.”

“Okay. Any questions for me?” I asked.

“Yes. How do you keep yourself busy?”

“I’m usually serving people when I manage to find the odd job, trying to save up for studies.”

“What are you planning to study?”

“Biochemistry.”

Willy’s eyebrows raised. “Aaahh. Interesting. Not only are you beautiful, but you’re also smart.”

I smiled. “Thank you.”

During dinner, Willy spoke to Mom mostly but also asked me a few questions to make me feel included. He wasn’t exactly handsome, but I did appreciate him talking to Mom respectfully.

After dinner, I took a shower and then went to bed. My room was right next to Willy’s. As I flipped over, I heard Mom scream. She got louder. I was hoping that she would wait a few nights before being intimate with Willy.

I covered my ears with a pillow when she yelled out that Willy should give it to her harder. Picturing a sweaty, hairy, old man behind my mother didn’t help much to make me fall asleep.

In the morning, the three of us had breakfast. When Willy asked how I slept, I looked at Mom, then at my plate before nodding with a mouthful.

After breakfast, Willy showed us around the farm. I laughed watching Mom milk a cow. Anything that kept her away from booze made me happy.

Several days later, Willy finished his dinner before us and excused himself.

“What do you think of Willy?” asked Mom.

“He seems nice.”

“He likes you, too.”

I smiled and raised my eyebrows. “Okay.”

“You know that Mama loves you and wouldn’t ask you to do anything you don’t want to do.”

“Yes.”

“Willy really likes you, and he asked me how’d you feel about joining him in his bed tonight.”

My head leaned forward. “What?”

“It’s just for tonight, honey. He’s a real good man, and he said he’ll pay for your studies.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes. Do it for Mama. We’ve got a shot at sorting out our lives.”

The thought of going to college and Mom having security was appealing. I only had Willy’s word, but it was better than nothing. Something about his character told me that I could trust him.

“Only for tonight?” I asked.

“Absolutely. If he doesn’t deliver on his promise, we’re out of here.”

“Okay.”

I walked into Willy’s room and saw him lying on the bed, wearing only a vest and jocks. He smiled as I approached the bed. I sat beside him, and he stroked my arm.

I smiled, then sat on top of him and pulled off my shirt. Willy squeezed my tits and moaned. I rocked on him and felt him get harder. He closed his eyes and ran his hands on my leg.

I was on my knees as I pulled his jocks off, then grabbed his dick and lowered my lips onto it. He pressed the back of my head as I sucked it, and he moaned.

After sucking him for several minutes, I pulled off my panties and sat on Willy. He grabbed my waist, and I jumped on his dick. Willy groaned as I increased the pace. I closed my eyes and pressed my hands on his chest.

He grabbed my shoulders and pulled me towards him, I leaned forward, and he groped my tit. I exhaled deep breaths. He sure knew how to suck a nipple to make it hard.

I clutched a fist of his dishevelled hair, and he ran his hand to my ass and squeezed it. I knew that he wanted to give it to me from behind.

After I got off him, he got off the bed. My forearms rested on the bed and below my chest as my bum hovered over the edge of the bed. Willy got behind me and grabbed my waist.

He stuck his dick into my pussy, grabbed my ponytail and then pulled it back. I screamed as he thrust harder. Although his dick was average length, he knew how to use it.

Willy put his other hand on my shoulder and increased the pace. I shot out several screams. He pulled off my hairband and loosened my hair.

I got on my knees in front of him and then engulfed his dick with my mouth. He raked his fingers through my hair and moaned. He smiled as I rattled his dick, his tip smacking the corners of my lips.

I lay on the bed and spread my legs open. Willy stuck his dick in and grabbed my legs. I closed my eyes and moaned as he penetrated.

After penetrating me for several minutes, Willy frowned and stopped. He shook a bit and then shot his load inside me.

The following day while I was stroking a horse, Mom came to me and said, “Willy said he enjoyed your company.”

“Okay, I’m glad.”

“He said that you should forward him the application papers of the university where you want to study.”

My mouth slacked open, and I raised my eyebrows. “Are you serious?”

She smiled and nodded. I threw my arms around her and squeezed her as our cheeks pressed against each other.

“I can’t believe this,” I said.

Mom cupped my face. “You deserve it after everything you’ve been through. Didn’t Mama tell you to always be positive?”

“Yes, you did.”

The university I applied to was several hours away, so Willy was kind enough to fund my accommodation at the dorm.

On the day of my departure, I looked at Mom, and tears filled my eyes. That was the first time I would leave her side.

“Are you going to be okay?” I asked.

“Of course, I am. Your Mama’s a fighter. I’ve got Willy. He’s gonna take care of me. So don’t you worry. You just focus on your studies.”

“Promise me that you won’t drink?”

She pursed her lips. “When last did you see me drink?”

She had a point. I felt secure about leaving Mom with Willy. As long as he treated her with respect and supported her, I believed that she would lay off the bottle.

I loved everything about my course and the university. Everyone was friendly. The only thing I didn’t like about the dorm was that the noise reminded me of my stay at the motels.

Everything was going great during the three years of my studies, then Mom called.

“Honey, I thought I should tell you that Willy passed away.”

“What?”

“He had a heart attack.”

“Oh, my God. I’m so sorry, Mom. You okay?”

“I’m a bit shaken up, but I’m hanging in there.”

I immediately got worried when she said that she was shaken up as I knew how she diagnosed that.

“I can come and visit,” I said.

“No, honey. I’ll be fine. You’ve got your finals to worry about.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. I’ll be fine.”

I was worried about Mom being alone as I knew she wasn’t used to it, so I called every day. She said that she hadn’t drank, and I felt better knowing that she had inherited Willy’s estate.

I kept calling her every day, and she mentioned a few times that she was lonely but had found company. I was worried about the company that she kept.

Two days later, I called again. Mom didn’t answer. My heartbeat raced. I called several more times, but she didn’t answer. That night, I thought about getting on a bus and going to her. As I headed for the door, my phone rang.

“Mom.”

“Honey, I see you called,” she said, groggily.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

She wasn’t. I could tell that she was drunk and had probably passed out when I called. “I’m coming to visit you.”

“No, don’t. I’m fine. Finish your studies.”

“Mom, I’m coming.”

“Joeleen, you listen to your Mama,” she snapped.

“Fine,” I said softly. “If you say so.”

I called the following day, and Mom hadn’t answered. Fearing the worst, I grabbed my bag and went to the bus station.

On my way to Mom, my phone rang.

“Hello. This is Maria.”

“Yes. Hi. How are you, Maria?”

“I don’t know how to tell you this.”

“Tell me what.”

“I’m sorry, but your mother passed away.”

My forehead wrinkled as tears formed in my eyes. “What?”

“I’m so sorry.”

My shoulders shuddered, and my head rattled as I dunked my face into my palms and bawled my eyes out.

When I got to the farm, a doctor was waiting for me. He told me that Mom had mixed pills with alcohol. The doctor grabbed my arms as I dropped to the floor. I had no energy to stand.

Two days later, a lawyer arrived at the farm. He told me that Mom named me the beneficiary to the estate.

I walked outside and looked at the land, animals and amenities. I had everything I ever dreamt of: tranquillity, stability, a home, food and a bright future, yet I felt I had nothing because the person I loved the most was no longer by my side.

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